Should I Date Someone With A Kid?

by Peter
Posted On

There is absolutely nothing wrong if you choose to date someone who has a child. As long as you are mature enough to help take care of a child or kid. The kid or teen needs to be taken care of, have decent people around him or her, and interact with. These are things that are important to a person, no matter the age.

Things To Consider Before Dating Someone With a Kid

Can You Interact With Their Kid?

Depending on the kid’s age, it may make their day to have someone to play with. This could be games, toys, or even video consoles. As long as you do not make it seem as though it is a chore for you and that someone is forcing you to do so, you will do great.

It Will Be Intense

Dating someone with a kid can be intense or emotional. It could be both at one time. For those who have never really had an opportunity to be around a kid, it could also bring so much joy to your life. What you will find is that trying to develop a relationship and build on a romance is going to be hard. A child can make life chaotic. They want and need, but they can also show jealousy towards others around their parent.

It Can Be A Wild Ride

A child is accustomed to routines. Anything that takes that routine away can be considered an enemy to the child. This is why, and you need to understand it, you must also build a friendship with the child. If the person you are dating is worth the extra effort, you will fall in love with the child also.

Set Rules And Boundaries

Before meeting the child, you should have an understanding of the child’s life. The boundaries that have been set for the child. How to deal with something the child may say or do to you. Life is not always easy, and putting a child in the mix can make it harder.

Along with this, you must also understand the limits and limitations. If you are one that gets upset easily, this may not be a good relationship to pursue. However, if you are a calm and caring person who is not afraid to help out when needed, ask the parent first, then continue on.

>>Also Read: Should I Date A Single Mom?

Do Not Try To Replace His Real Father If He Is In The Picture

Another thing that needs to be understood is that the other parent will continue to be a fixture in the child’s life. There needs to be respect shown for that person. The child can easily sense tension and stress around him. Make an effort to be polite and respectful to the absent parent from the house.

The child can be emotional. This may still be hurtful to them that mom and dad are not together in the home any longer. The kid may try to hold that against you. You want to build some semblance of a friendship and trust with the child. Let them know that you understand what they are feeling. It is also NEVER okay to speak negatively about their parent, even if one of them does. A child looks to an adult to protect them and care for them. They want to know that they can count on you to be there.

Be Prepared For Changes

Dating someone with a kid requires extra planning for dates or trips. Kids also get sick at seemingly the last minute. At times, this may seem like a kid planned it to prevent the parent from being with you. This is a circumstance when you need to remain calm. Be concerned for the child; let them know you care. Not all plans can be rescheduled, so there could be some upset feelings from one or more of you.

When it is possible, include the kid in the plans. There is no reason not to. This may also wear the kid out, so they sleep really well at night too. A child does like to be included, but they must also learn that they can not always do the same things as you and his or her parent.

Prepare For The Awkward Moments

There are bound to be some awkward moments between the three of you. Maybe the child walks in when you are planting a smooch on her. This may cause jealousy in the child. All you can really do is talk things over with your partner and come to some sort of consensus as to what you should say in a case like that.

Dating someone with a kid or kids can be very hard. You want to give the kids some space, but not so much space they think they got rid of you. You want to interact with them as often as possible to let them see that you do care. They need to see that you are willing to stay home and watch television at night rather than going out all the time.